words..

bile nk ckp kne hati2..sbb klu dh terlepas ckp, x leh tarik balik. lagi2 la klu bercakap dgn yakin nye. seperti yg berlaku smasa aku nk ke birmingham. cite nye, kitorg nk naek train from coventry to selly oak. so, mse kt station coventry tu, pnye la bnyk practice sebut "selly oak" bnyk kali, skali dh smpai kt kaunter dgn yakin nye aku melafazkan "can i have 3 tickets to coventry please?" org kt kaunter tu cengang jek. aku pun pelik la. then khairul n iwan gelak. bru la aku prasan, yg aku tersalah sebut coventry sedangkn kitorg kt station coventry...haha, malu nye...tpi xpe, kitorg dpt ticket free utk blk ke coventry lg [mybe org kaunter tu menyindir aku, huhu] but kitorg plan nk bermlm kt umah muiz, azri n syafiq kt birm...hurm, cite psl words lg, aku hairan, ramai yg suke cakap maen lepas je, tapi x mengotakan ape yg dikatakan. bnyk janji manis yg aku dh dengar, namun x sampai 10% dikotakan. ada masa aku terasa bodoh sebab terlalu percaya yg sume org akan mengotakan apa yg dijanjikn walaupun sesenang mana pun perkara tue..aku dh ilang kepercayaan kt sume org da...so sape2 yg terasa hati, mntak maap la ye sbb aku nyer pegangan dh bertukar. janji bersama-sama, tpi last2 yg tinggal hanya la diri sendiri..sbb diri sendiri selalu menjadi perkara utama. bkn ke kite panggil bnde cmtu "penting kn diri"? yea...btul2...sharing is caring? nonsense! sharing is always about the benefits we get from it, btul x? sharing konon, padahal ade niat lain. nk tau apsal aku ckp mcm tu? aku dtg kt merantau with nothing. just myself. no preparation. ble aku ajak share, nobody want it. ble aku dh set up all the daily things, sharing is the main focus. fuck it! i'm sick, tired dgn sume kepuraan. so, somebody out there, help me gain my trust to others, again...peace